Update on Grandma

Just an update on Grandma. I've been there every day this week except for Monday. On Tuesday she was still talking quite a bit, and was so sweet. Jon and Dave came up to visit her, and she was so excited to see them and their kids. Then later I was sitting with her with my hand on her arm, and giving her ice chips when she asked for them. She took my hand in hers, and I said, "What can I do for you, Grandma?" She said, "I'm just saying thank you." She is such a good and gracious woman! What an example for me.

Yesterday I was there with Aunt Annette, and we were talking about when Annette was a child, and then when Annette met Mike and then got married, and Grandma was making comments and remembering things that had happened. Her mental acuity is just amazing. She was having a harder time talking though, and more trouble breathing.

I went and visited her this afternoon, and she slept the whole time. I don't know if she is less alert in the afternoon, but she could hardly wake up to talk to us. Jan and I really think the end is near. She is really laboring to breathe at times, and she isn't able to hardly see any more. Oh, I hope it is soon for her sake. It is so hard to see her getting weaker and weaker. Thankfully, she is not in much pain. Part of me wants to stay there all the time so that I can be with her until she goes, but we still don't know how long that will be yet. We did wake her up before we left, and kissed her and told her we loved her. She said very weakly that she loved us too. As I was walking out, I wondered if it is the last time I will see her in this life. It makes me sad to think that, and yet I hope that she isn't here much longer.

I have been having a lot of insights into the Plan of Salvation during this process. There is nothing like facing death to help you realize what life is all about. The other day I turned from my computer at work, and as often happens, caught sight of the Salt Lake Temple outside the window. I thought of Grandma, and suddenly realized anew that because Grandma and Grandpa were sealed in the temple (in that temple, actually), that they would truly be together forever as husband and wife. What a blessing to know that even though I am about to lose my Grandma here on earth, she will always be my Grandma, and I will see her again.

Then yesterday when I first got there, Aunt Eileen had a Tabernacle Choir CD playing in the background. Suddenly I heard the words:

When I leave this frail existence
When I lay this mortal by
Father, mother, may I meet you
In your royal courts on high...

It was so touching to be sitting by Grandma, who is about to depart from this world, and to hear those words. There really is meaning in all of the suffering that we must endure. I truly believe that it will all be made up to us when we go back home and meet our Father and Mother, and find the great things that they have prepared for us. It is just around the corner for my beloved Grandma!

Watch for Jenni's birthday post tomorrow!